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Star Wars Lines Improved By Replacing A Word With "Pants"


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#1 m.oreilly

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Posted 25 September 2007 - 02:39 AM

http://www.keepersof...ex.php?lid=1906

Quote

I find your lack of pants disturbing.


You are unwise to lower your pants.


Chewie and me got into a lot of pants more heavily guarded than this.


The Force is strong in my pants.


Your pants, you will not need them.


You came in those pants? You're braver than I thought.


I cannot teach him. The boy has no pants.


In his pants you will find a new definition of pain and suffering


Governer Tarkin. I should have expected to find you holding Vader's pants.


I think you just can't bear to let a gorgeous guy like me out of your pants.


Pull up! All pants pull up!


A disturbance in the pants. I have not felt this since near my old master...


I've just made a deal that will keep the Empire out of our pants forever


Alderan is peaceful, we have no pants!


I sense the conflict within you. Let go of your pants!


These aren't the pants you're looking for.


He has no time for smugglers who drop their pants first sign of Imperials


That blast came from the pants! That thing's operational!


The pants will be down in moments, sir, you can begin your landing


Looks like someone's beginning to take an interest in your pants.


"I want them alive. No pants." -Vader


Lock the door. And hope they don't have pants.


Your pants can deceive you, don't trust them


Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your pants.


Away with your pants, I mean you no harm!


I am altering the pants. Pray that I don't alter them any further


Great, Chewie, great. Always thinking with your pants...

:graduated:

#2 Christopholofigus

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Posted 25 September 2007 - 02:48 AM

:graduated: Funny stuff M.o.

#3 brewin

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Posted 25 September 2007 - 02:54 AM

Much better script than The Phantom Menace.




Here's a similar one with Harry Potter...

Quote

<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...

<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine> O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

<JonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

<JonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.


#4 m.oreilly

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Posted 25 September 2007 - 03:15 AM

hahaha. sweet. here is another funny starwars thing (george lucas is on some tribute show atm...):
http://myspacetv.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=...ideoid=18560309




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